Al Quaeda, in attempts to foil post-9/11 airport security, have created possibly the ultimate in concealed anti-personel devices: the directed energy high explosive tampon.
Constructed from cotton and Semtex, the explosive tampon has an effective kill-radius of 5 meters, and with the directed energy effects could quite easily blow a hole in an airplane floor fuselage.
Activated by pulling the string, Al Quaeda scientists believe the strong feminine odour would deter sniffer dogs from inspecting the crotch area, or at least cause shame and embarrassment to the dogs and their handlers.
A spokesman for BA has already come out and described their position on explosive tampons as “Stumped and unnerved”, with many in the industry considering the procedures needed to properly check for explosive tampons as potentially less pleasant than the consequences of one actually bringing down an airliner.
One solution put forward by health secretary Andrew Lansley is an outright ban on menstruating women being allowed to fly, although critics have already found ways even this system could be breached.
For now, air passengers are being advised to travel as normal. More news as it unfolds.